Last year on Thursday December 3rd, my son called me from college and said he was being sent home with the swine flu. Exactly one year ago today Monday, December 7, 2009, right here on this blog I wrote these words:
This weekend, with Andy back in the house, reminded me that no matter how big our children get, they are still our children. I love Andy no matter what; just as my heavenly Father loves me – no matter what. My heavenly Father died on the cross for me; I believe I would give my life for my son…BUT…will I allow my son the gift of free will, the gift to make his own choices without imposing my thoughts, beliefs, ideas and ideals on him. I cling to the promise in Proverbs 22:6, “train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” I know John and I trained him and brought him up in the right way.
Funny…one year later Andy lives on the other side of the country. While not having a lot of money, he seems to be content and is trying very hard to make it on his on. He asks for very, very little assistance from John and me. That plan that I do not see is in play.
Now…one year later I am reminded of these same thoughts in relation to a situation with my parents. They are getting older, in my opinion they no longer need to be living alone. While currently spending a couple of months with a sibling in a state other than where they live, my Mom seems determined to return to their home state and live in their house. My Dad will do whatever my Mom wants – not because he doesn’t have his own mind but because he loves her that much and wants her to be happy. He will do anything for my Mother. The sibling with which they are staying has offered for them to live with her and her husband. My parents will be 89 and 90 in February of 2011…I love them dearly. There are seven kids in my family…I believe we all want what is best for our parents, but…
will we allow them the gift of free will, the gift to make their own choices without imposing our thoughts, beliefs, ideas and ideals on them.
Lord, as I am faced with this situation with Mother and Daddy, please guide me. When it comes time in the next day or so to offer my opinion, please help me to be respectful and kind. You know my tongue can be very venomous at times. Lord, if it is your will for them to return to their home and live out their last days there, please help me be accepting of that and help us find the resources that they need to assist them. Lord, if it is best for them to stay where they are, please touch their hearts and make them open to that. Certainly on the surface, Lord, that seems to be best…but Your ways are not my ways and Your plan is one I do not see. So, Lord, I am really, really trying hard to let it go…please grant me that wish – to release this decision to Your will. Please guide me and the rest of my family on this journey…please give me a peace about this situation, Lord.
Whew…friends, you can see this is an emotional path I am on. I thank you in advance for your prayers.
By the way…like my new signature? I have thought it was neat when bloggers “signed” their post. I created mine at http://www.mylivesignature.com/ and it’s FREE!
Wow, Mary! You have been through a look, sweet friend. Continuing to lift you to the Father in prayer.
And yes, I love your signature. How did you do it?
Also I made several kinds of cookies this weekend…eggnog meltaways, brownie oreos, and a gingerbread cake. It was fun…now, I need to give them all away so I don't eat all those unneeded calories!!!
blessings
~a
Oh, Mary, what a precious precious post you've left today. Our children…our parents…free wills…our relationship with God…so much food for thought. I WILL be praying about the matter at hand and how the Lord will move in your heart when it is time for you to give your opinion. It is tough when it is our parents. My father-in-law is will be 84 in February and he stays alone since my mother-in-law passed away almost four years ago now. It's hard…but Father has given us the power to allow him to bring us comfort and also to work in the hearts of your parents.
Praying for you…and yes, I like your new signature. Thanks for sharing the link.
Praying for you this morning Mary. That His direction would be clear and the process would be full of His grace and peace.
Dear dear Mary,
My heart is heavy with the burden of prayer for you and yours. You are certainly in the "sandwich" generation, between two generations–one trying new wings–the other trying to keep those old wings flapping–trying not to "return to the nest" so to speak.
This could be a real dilemma if it weren't for God and His faithfulness.
I join you in your prayer, Mary, for your son and your parents.
I love your heart for God, your honesty and transparency–
Praying for you,
Dianne
and I love your new signature!!
Mary,
I will keep your parents and your family in my prayers. Thank you for writing so honestly about your walk with the Lord.
Lifting you and your family in prayer. What a hard position to be in. I faced a somewhat similar struggle this year and we made a decision that was very difficult. I pray for your peace over whatever you decide (or don't decide). May the Lord bless you as you so obviously seek to please him.
Praying for you today, Mary. Thanks for sharing your heart.