“I have a good husband, but I don’t appreciate him enough.” Alice* uttered these words while hanging out with a group of women from work.
We were talking about husbands. Sally* is in the process of getting a divorce and Carol* had just said what a wonderful husband she had. Carol went on to say that she had been fortunate enough to have two good husbands because she had been widowed 20 years earlier at age 33.
Then I said, “I know I have a good husband. And if I ever forget Sally* is quick to remind me!”
Sally said, “Mary’s husband is kind, has a good sense of humor, is considerate, nice…” She continued rattling off my husband’s good qualities.
That is when Alice said what she said…”I have a good husband, but I don’t appreciate him enough.”
I know Sally is right,
but I wonder if I fall into the same category as Alice. I know I do
not tell my husband that I appreciate his good qualities. I don’t tell him thank you for being a caring husband. For being a godly example to our son. For always putting me and others before himself. I don’t tell him thank you…at least not as often as I should.
We have been married for 33 and there is no one that I would rather spend time with than my husband. Truly. We enjoy good conversation, a nice bottle of wine, a walk in the neighborhood, sitting outside enjoying the weather. We love to have a entertain whether it is a small dinner party with a total of 4 people or a party for 40…it doesn’t matter what we do, we just enjoy being together. (And he is great a cooking and cleaning up after the party!)
Still…I don’t say thank you for all he does. For all he IS.
It is easy to get in a rut. Easy to slip into “auto” mode where we go through our days without really talking. Without doing more than a peck on the lips and an “I love you” in passing. I no longer have kids at home and it happens to me. I can only imagine what happens in marriages where there are kids, soccer practice, dance lessons, school activities, piano lessons, church activities…the list goes on.
John and I try to make each other a priority, but sometimes we fail.
A few years ago I read Praying God’s Word for Your Husband by Kathi Lipp. I even did a book study on it with some women from my church. All of the women that read the book and participated said it made a difference. Maybe I need to read it again.
I'm with you, Mary, on two points. John IS great. He totally ROCKS.
And, I feel the same as you with the whole "not appreciating my husband enough" thing. You bring up a good point about it being a good idea to read that book again. Maybe I will! I kept it for that very reason.
Great pictures of you all, by the way.
Thanks, Kathleen…but don't tell John!! He'll be too hard to live with! 🙂
Dear Mary, first of all I am wondering how your dear mom is doing–and I loved this post–very gentle but very convicting for me–I am going to do a better job especially this week of letting my husband know just how much I appreciate him. Friday, the 31st, he will have taken care of me for 50 years! Thank you for a sweet post–
P.S. Sometimes it irritates me (LOL) but I have many people telling me of all the great qualities my husband possesses also–
Dianne, my mom is doing well. Thank you. Happy Anniversary!! 50 years!! That is so awesome!! My parents were married 70 years on Feb. 13, 2014..just a few weeks before my dad passed away. What an awesome testimony 50 years is!
My wife almost never gives words of appreciation. But, Mary…it's OK.
I take it on faith. I threw my heart over that fence when I said "I do", and it's up to me to live the vow, overt appreciation or no.
Andrew…I think you are probably a pretty special guy!
I love seeing photos of you ans John together. You both are beautiful!! Great role models!
Thanks, Kathy. I must say most of these pictures are a couple of years old. I have long hair now!
I can be guilty of the same. I have a really good husband, but I don't think I let him know as often as I should. Thank you for the reminder, Mary.
What a pleasant surprise friend! So happy you stopped by…I know how busy you are these days. Hug Joseph…he's a special guy!